The Heartbreak Diaries: Part 1, Day 3

No call today.  Yesterday he called me multiple times and we had a discussion about our break up.  Today there was no such call.  To a certain extent, I didn’t miss the calls.  I went back to work and it helped keep me occupied.  I was mostly focused on the task at hand. 

My deepest fear is calling him. If I call him, I lose the game.  I appear weak and I know that I will end up going back to him after listening to his ass backwards bs about how everything is my fault.  I now know that it’s not my fault.  I just wonder why I have such a deep seated loathing for myself.  Why would I cry over a 29 year old man who still lives at home, has no license, no job, no future?  Why am I torturing myself this way…

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